One Album Per Hour – LIVE!


After a sold out run at the Edinburgh Festival, “One Album Per Hour” is ready to hit your youtube screen!

And I am so excited! Somehow i’ve managed to get some of my music and comedy hero’s to produce my next 4 album’s, LIVE! I”ll be composing, arranging, producing, mixing and mastering in real time using the Beardytron5000 mkIII. And you won’t believe who’s doing it…


Jack Black                - 14th September

Peter Serafinowicz  - 23rd September

Tim Minchin            - 30th September

Daniel Sloss             – 7th October


I’m so stoked!! Tune in live to be a part of it, or if you can’t make it for the event, give your made-up song title suggestions in the bar on the right of the website.

Leeds Festival 2014 – featuring The Beardytron5000 mkIII


yes that’s right, mark 3!!!


The Beardytron5000 mkIII is now fully operational and weaponised. The mkII saw the system shed all shop bought hardware, focusing on a bespoke software approach coded from the ground up in C++. It allowed the system to overdub, copy, offline bounce, merge, move, multiply and replace and resample audio content in a grid of non-mutually exclusive loops. It also featured an integrated system of specially adapted instances of Turnado by Sugarbytes, which ended up being released as Turnado v1.5

MkIII sees loads more advances to this already world-beatingly powerful beast. The Beardytron now has fully customisable midi input capability via the use of plogue bidule as an intermediary stage which means that i have been able to configure some very convenient foot-pedal-controlled functions to keep my hands free.

A second laptop now replaces my trusty Korg R3 which, good as it was was no match for what i have now: an arduously and intricately configured M4L based VSTi host with midi-looping and groundbreaking real-time quantisation features utilising many instances of massive, pianoteq and other awesome synths.

Also, new to the mkIII is my new proprietary “Instant Drum Machine” VST which allows me to carve out new rhythms every time from an immense bank of thousands of different permutations of variants of different classes of rhythm types. The Instant drum machine works exclusively with live-recorded samples so i still start with nothing, no pre-recorded samples, no static rhythm patterns just the potential to create new sounds and patterns Coupled with this are 4 more instances of Turnado, one for each drum catagory (which, once again comes up trumps as a goto multi-effects workhorse).

I’m still busily configuring these exciting and dauntingly deep new parts to the system and slowly but surely becoming expert at using the system as a whole… which is the ultimate goal.

Massive thanks to the incredible developers who have helped me with this project. . It’s just beginning.


One Album Per Hour – Edinburgh Fringe 2014


ONE ALBUM PER HOUR IS COMING SOON to a youtube near you, live! —– Sep 14th to oct 14th 2014 —– featuring some very special guests.

In the meantime, here’s my show from Edinburgh 2014.

Menco Pranda – footage unearthed after being lost in the vaults for 36 years

Beardyman @ the Neptune Seattle 2013

The Freestyle Project

The Freestyle Project – a diverse collective formed of some of the UK’s most talented freestyle MC’s brought together and accompanied by Beardyman.

Stig of the Dump
Klumzy tung
Dr Syntax
Orifice Vulgatron (Foreign Beggars)
Honey Brown
The man like John

featuring JFB on the decks and ‘j’m black on space-guitar


It started with a session in a warehouse in North London and ended up with a live show in the infamous Udderbelly.

I’ve no idea why it’s taken this long to get it up online but it has, so there. .

This is the last remaining footage of the Koas-Pad-cluster-fuck that was my old system. Consider this it’s swan song. Yes, Kaos Pads are made of swans. . . . swans. . . swans. . .
The Freestyle Project was an experiment in freestyle lyricism, something a little more uplifting than the usual gladiatorial, one-upmanship based battles which freestyle rap is generally used for. It was an amazing time working with some mad talent and it will be done again in some or other form soon. So …. watch this space. . . .



…and here’s the album we improvised together in the jam sessions that kicked off the whole project in a warehouse Manor House.


“I hate my boss” – The Freestyle Project – feat. Dizraeli and Leen

The Freestyle Project – a diverse collective of some of the UK’s most on-point and talented freestyle MC’s brought together and accompanied by Beardyman. Here is a small teaser of the full movie which documents the cypher’s that started it all and the incredible improvised show that resulted from it.



“When we die our butts become stickers” – the wisdom of the child

Eat Sleep Rave Repeat

oot sloop roov roopoot

I dun a TED talk

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